FORMING HABITS

So with the school year starting there is a chunk of time three times a week where I have no boys. I have decided to take the plunge and work out and read my Bible. These are two habits I have been trying to establish in my life. I do both, but not habitually or nearly as much as I should or would like to do them.

First, in my family growing up we would sit as much as possible. I cultivated a life of laziness. I have been slowly breaking that bad habit, but it is a tough one to break. It is funny because whenever I am doing the things I should it feels much better than when I do nothing and am lazy. Somehow I can often forget that important truth.

So here I go. The plan is to exercise right after I drop the boys off at preschool. Then after working out enjoy a wonderful psalm. After that errands or whatever else needs to be done. This way I will be healthy body and soul. And I know at the end of the day I will feel much better than if I didn't do it.

In what ways do you get deceived that it would be better not to do something than remember that it always feels great when you do what you should?

SUMMER GOODNESS

I haven't written in a long time, but I guess I kept looking at my last post and felt like that was still true. It will probably remain to be true for a long time so I decided to move on.

Summer has ended. I didn't want to admit it until the rain came this weekend and I had to dig out the pants for everyone. This summer was one of the best. We got to go away quite a bit. We went to the coast in July with David's family and we just had a blast. We went to Arizona also and we all had the best time. We are still missing it in fact. This past weekend we went to Portland, Corvallis and Eugene. We took the boys and Christina to Enchanted Forest and really just enjoyed every day together with family.

This summer the boys grew and learned more things. I put them in swim lessons and by the end of Arizona they were jumping in the water and swimming on their own with their life vests. Maybe next year they will work up to no life vests. We will see.

They also learned how to ride their bikes. I am pretty sure they have had those things for a year and a half, but they didn't have much motivation to ride them. One day Judah decided he would do it and Benjamin followed a few days later. Now that is the number one activity they want to do. It is fun to see them ride. They get focused and have a fish face sometimes and other times they just smile looking so proud of doing it.

I also noticed the front bottom tooth is very wiggly on both of them. So crazy that we will be dealing with that stage soon. They also start preschool again this year. They go for a couple hours three days a week. It isn't much, but at the same time starting to feel like a lot. All of it reminds me this is my last year with them before school daily. I am so happy to watch them grow and I love them at every age, but it is also hard to let them go.

I am glad to have had such a rich summer with family. I am so lucky to have such great family and blessed to have time with them. We all cherish the memories. You can tell the boys do as they ask me daily if we can go to Arizona or to Eugene.

DEEP NEED

I desperately want to be closer to God. I have wanted this since the moment I believed, but now I lost even the passion I possessed back then. I have been thinking a lot about the idea of as you seek God then that feeds the desire for more. So I have been trying in anyway and at any time to be seeking him. Nothing really is going wrong in my life, except for that you always have something, but nothing major. Everything else is worthless compared to him as Paul says and I have been thinking of that often as I think part of me doesn't embrace that for some reason. It is not that I have anything I deem important, just little stupid things I like to do when I could be with God. You would think that would be easy to give up since I acknowledge that it is meaningless, but I find myself consistently making the wrong choice. I am not really looking for an answer since it is clear what I need to do: keep pressing in. God only wants success in this area for me so I have no doubt I will attain it with His great help.

TOUCH

I have been thinking about one of my senses a lot lately: touch.  The power of a touch is very great.  I guess I have been thinking about it for a while.  I started to realize how little David and I touch.  It started of course when we had the twins.  In the beginning I am not sure we could have done much to touch very often as someone was crying.  When he came home a break for me was the fact that he would take one and then I would only have one to deal with.  The problem with that is everyone had a baby and no one had time or energy left for the other.   

I have been working on touching David more often.  Grabbing his hand  while we are on a walk or going out of my way for a good hug.  Let me tell you it has paid off.  Not only do I love it, but it is filling a need for connection.  If someone would have said I have one simple step to improve your marriage.  I would have got my pen out and been ready.  If then they would have said touch each other more, I probably wouldn't have written it down after all.  I mean it is so simple, easy, and even quick.  But, I am telling you it is working for me at least.

I wonder why touch is so powerful?  I wonder why God made us that way?  What do you think?  How does touch affect your life?

THE BOYS' GRADUATION

The boys graduated from their two day preschool class yesterday.  Next year they move on to the three day preschool class.  Maybe it wasn't that big of a step but the graduation ceremony was a lot of fun.  I posted a video so you can see it.  Judah was a ham.

TEST RESULTS IN

The nurse called to tell me all the test had come back normal so another dead end.  I am very grateful that on paper I am a very healthy person.  Things could be much, much worse.  So I continue on with a question mark for a diagnosis.

WHAT'S IN A NAME?

I went to the doctor recently.  He had gone on a long four month boat trip and asked me to come in so he could check on me before refilling my prescriptions.  He informed me that he was ordering some blood work.  It will check my insides and he has ordered some other test to rule out any conditions that fit my symptoms.  

I think it is funny that he still is looking for some sort of diagnosis, but of course that is his job.  I have just come to think that a diagnosis is pretty far fetched since each day is different.  My pain isn't exactly constant.  It varies up and down, like cycles.  But, I have been at peace with no diagnosis for the most part.  This however has made me start to hope again.

I start hoping something would be found and that there would be some cure.  Of course if all I got was something to call what I have somehow I would appreciate that.  Isn't that strange?  I just want a name for it.  I don't know why that matters, but if I am honest it does.

I don't want to hope too much.  I try not to think of it much.  I didn't even want to write about it because then I would be admitting it.  I know of course my hope is in the Lord, who has brought me through and gives me all I need, diagnosis or not.